Emerald Dawn Part 1: Hal Jordan

When Abin Sur (Green Lantern 1 of sector 2814) crashed landed on Earth, he knew that he was going to die. With what little life was left in him, he instructed his ring to seek out and find "a man who was perfectly honest and born without fear" (since retconned to be: "capable of overcoming great fear."

Abin Sur's ring found Hal Jordan. They would one day say that Hal Jordan was the greatest Green Lantern of them all but before he was inducted, he was an arrogant and reckless air force test pilot. The ring saw potential in him, however, and brought him to the body of Abin Sur.

Abin Sur commissioned Hal to join the Green Lantern Corps. and Hal accepted.

When Hal flew for the first time, a fail safe in the ring brought him to the center of the universe on the planet Oa sector 0 before the Guardians of the Universe. The Guardians of the Universe were the first race created and thus took upon themselves the task of guarding the universe . . . always watching. The Green Lantern Corps. was their second attempt to police the galaxy through the harnessing of the green light of willpower. Anyone who wields the green light channeled through the ring would be able to create solid light constructs, fly, live in space, etc.

Until Hal Jordan, there had never been a human Green Lantern before and the entire corps was skeptical. This included the Corps. drill sergeant, Kilowog, who worked to break Jordan, but try as me did, he couldn't break the nearly limitless will of the human. Hal Jordan showed enough potential for further training. The Guardians saw it fit to pair the human with the pride of the Corps., Sinestro.

Sinestro and Hal became close friends and Jordan flourished under Sinestro's difficult training. The friendship would not last, however, when Sinestro's true nature was revealed. It would become apparent that he had become the dictator of his home planet and forced the natives to follow his every militant order. Seeing that Sinestro was mad with power, Jordan called in the Corps. and threw down Sinestro.

Hell

I will preface this by saying I haven't read this in forever. I wrote it two years ago and it was simply titled, "Hell." ENjoy.

I was once asked the infamous question “What kind of merciful god would send people to Hell” and the only answer that I ever could muster up was, a just one; this of course being a very weak argument that could have been potentially torn to shreds. It was, however, the only way I knew how to explain it. A merciful god would, of course, be forgiving of sins, but due to the nature and purity of God He can not over look the sin in our lives. Hence why He needed to send the ultimate sacrificial lamb namely Jesus Christ.

The wages of sin is death and death is all that God can pay us for the work that we’ve done, unless we have been redeemed by the blood of Christ. There will be a lot of good sinners in Hell, but there will be no redeemed sinners there. This of course raises the question, “What exactly is a sinner/ what makes a sinner.”

A sinner is any man not bought with the blood of Christ, and sin is living a life style that is pleasing to you. In essence, when you live life for yourself you are making yourself God and Lord over your own life, and by asking for salvation you are saying that you can’t guide your own life and that you need a savior. In the end, after death, everyone will get what they want as according to the way or for whom they lived their life. If they lived their life for God, then they shall be welcomed into their Father’s rest, but if they lived life for themselves than they will be thrown from the presence of the almighty and will be torn from Him forever. The presence of the divine being forever absent in their life for the rest of eternity. Everyone wins in the end. If you lived life for yourself and without God in life, then in the end you get what you want, a life without God. This of course is based upon the knowledge that the person you are bickering with believes that there is a God, because you can’t argue the existence of Hell without first arguing the existence of God. If the person you are deliberating with had no belief in God, then first you must establish the belief that there is a God or at least establish the assumption. Typically, I would conclude an argument, by telling the person if they are right and there is no Hell or God, I’m fine. I’ve lived life for a lie and I’m going to rot into dirt, no great loss, but if I’m right, and they’re wrong. Then they will really know what it’s like to live outside the divine for all of eternity, which would be a great loss.

Philosophy of Worship

In this class, we have discussed that worship is in essence to worth-ship or the act of assigning worth to something. I think that this may be is a little oversimplified. I believe that worship is the act of assigning worth to a benevolent deity in response to what you believe that deity has done for you. This may sound shallow, but I would disagree. Without God’s intervention into our lives, we would never know of his existence. Our faith would be built on speculation and on nothing substantial. So therefore, because we have substantial evidence of his existence we can respond with our act of worship.

But how do we worship this benevolent deity who has done so much for us? What could we possibly give to Him that He wouldn’t already have? The answer I believe lies within the action. You see, each and every human being has been equipped with a certain set of talents. Some can sing, dance, act, speak, write, love, or simply open up their homes to whomever. In response to the act of this benevolent God giving us these gifts and equipping us with them, it is our imperative to use them for his glory.

The apostle Paul tells Timothy in 1 Timothy 4:14, to not neglect his gifts. I believe that this can be applied straight across the board. We need to not neglect the gifts that God has given us. In order to properly “assign worth” to this deity, we need to take the gifts that He has given us and essentially give them back. In this we find that merely living becomes an act of worship both unconscious and unconscious. Because what is life apart from an undeserved gift of this benevolent deity? Nothing.

So I have found that in order to worship God in spirit, we need to make the decision to live our life to the fullest in accordance with his word. We have been given the guidelines and in order to worship Him properly we need to follow them to the best of the ability that He has instilled us with. Thusly worshipping him in spirit. In order to worship him in truth, we need to be honest with ourselves. We must recognize our specific gifts and fine tune with so that they are acceptable tools in the hands of the master.

We should waste our time on frivolous abilities that will never come to us because it doesn’t match our function. I’m not implying that we give up all that is not useful, just simply that we concentrate more on what is useful and less on what is frivolous. Someone who cannot sing but can write or simply be hospitable shouldn’t waste time singing that would be better spent honing the skills that they do have. One cannot simply rest on one’s laurels in the kingdom of God.

This implies a great deal of things with our worship . . . Namely, the concept of first fruits. This is to say, we need to offer God our best not just what comes out first. In order, to properly worship God we need to do so with an ability that makes an unbeliever stymied. If we posses the spirit of the God of creation within ourselves, then it is imperative that we look like we do.

I believe my specific abilities to lie within acting. When I am on a stage, behind a character, I feel more connected to God than anywhere else. It was what I was created to do. If I simply banked on that and perpetually assigned myself to half-hearted Christmas plays that never truly unlock the potential of my talents then I have wasted the gift that God has given me. In order for it to be my worship, it must also posses some worth and in order to show that it holds worth to me, I must give it worth by giving it time.

What I have been discussing is for the most part my philosophy of personal worship. There is, however, a certain element of corporate worship that should also be addressed. I have stated above that not all sing. So does that mean in a corporate setting that I shouldn’t? No . . . perhaps not as a soloist but should I sing as an individual in a group? Yes. When we gather together in the name of the Lord something happens. It cannot be denied. When we raise our voices to the heavens in one accord in honor of God there is a power. I believe this ties more into worshipping the lord in spirit. We have the opportunity to openly commune with each other and with God in a public setting. We have the opportunity to make a public proclamation of faith with other people doing the same thing.

So in conclusion, God has established a connection with us through Creation and through his first coming. He has blessed us with wonderful gifts on top of blessing us with his grace. We respond to this benevolence with a symbolic act of appreciation and love. It is within this symbolic act that we find true worship. Where we connect with God in a way both similar and unique to fellow believers. We then take this connection and we share that with others in a corporate setting worshipping with each other in a way that unifies the body with one voice . . . a voice that reaches the heavens and touches the ear of the one who gave us the voice to begin with.

I'm talking about . . .

. . . feelings.

There came a place and a time in my life when I came to a conclusion . . . feelings just weren't worth the effort. What brings this topic up at 4:21 a.m.? The movie Leap Year. I know what you're saying . . . What in God's name were you doing watching a chick flick that early in the A.M. Two words . . . Chip Monelli. Oy. So anyway I digress.

Anyway, once again I have found myself in a precarious place. My insides feel rusty, misused, and covered in dust. It sort of feels like the machinations that make up the clockwork of my heart are missing a few cogs. I've wanted so badly again to feel, but I don't remember why. I've tried to improve my mood and the way I behave around people, but my kindness has been misunderstood.

My conclusion: Being kind only leads to being mean.

My reason: You can't be kind to people because they will always suspect an ulterior motive. So in the end, my pessimism may win out. The very people who tried to convince me that be optimistic and kind are the very ones who've now helped to convince me that maybe its just not worth it. I don't know if I can put any kind of theological argument in here to strengthen my case, and this is all more than likely a result of my own bitterness and current distress.

All in all . . . kindness is splendid . . . I just don't know if it works well for me.

I need a complicated, high maintenance girl . . . fml

-Scritch out

They should write a book about me . . .

It seems that I cannot escape my own thoughts. No matter how hard I try and no matter how far I run, it seems that I come right back around to me. I am consumed with my own wants and needs. I am sometimes no better than a devout LeVayin Satanist in how self-serving I am. I'm told that its human nature to look out for one's best interest but I don't know if I can believe that. I think that when God placed human brings within the garden, He did so with the intent that they would serve and be served only by others. We also see how in the New Testament church how everyone served everyone in whole hearted godliness in order to survive.

It's difficult to imagine that I belong to the same belief system that my forerunners did. I know that todays culture essentially requires me to not have full faith within my christian counter parts because not all are as they seem, but it nonetheless wears on me how modernized and desensitized I've become by my culture and it goes deeper than just entertainment. I think that at a base level I have allowed myself to buy into a lie.

A lie that says I need to look out for my best interest while everyone else does the same. I know that as a Christian I am called to serve others but it's just more convenient to serve myself. According to the way things are supposed to be, my brothers and sisters should meet my needs as God meets theirs and I meet theirs as God meets mine, but people are just so inconsistent that I can't really rely on them and likewise I am so inconsistent that people can't rely on me.

In the early church, everyone piled their belongings and met everyones needs as they came. We'd call that socialism and it only works in theory. (And I am by no means condoning Socialism in any form)

My thoughts are cluttered and hard to to define, but I can't help but realize just how blind I am. No matter how badly I want to live in an ideal Christian world where we all serve each other in beautiful Christian unity, I know that it really isn't plausible in today's society. Which is heart breaking because I'd wager that they knew a deeper relationship with Christ and with each other than you or I will ever know . . .

"They should write a book about you [me] because you're [I'm] so selfish it's funny."

-Showbread

-Scritch out

Leaving is the hardest bit

"Leaving is the hardest bit, but you go you'll be glad you did."

- All Left Out

I discovered two days ago just how depressed I am about graduating. Yeah I mean, sure I'm thrilled to be away from the rules and logistics of living here on campus but in reality it's really hard letting go. Hilariously enough, this revelation took place while walking passed Bong [the building not the drug implement] on my way to the theater for rehearsal. I began to think about the years I've spent here on campus and the number of times I'd walked past that building on my way to the theater. I thought about the friends I had as a freshman, and the friends that I have now. I though about the number of times I spent in that building and how I'd been there five times since then.

I remembered the time I called my mom just to say, "hi" as I walked back from the gym. I remembered the time Wes Burkett climbed the brick wall outside while hanging out with me, Travis and Travis' future wife, Harmony. I also remembered most fondly the time Larry, Dan, Travis, Chip, and I marched around the lamp post outside singing "Yellow Submarine" immediately after Chip had climbed up it twenty feet or so.

I guess this is all part of the nostalgia, but nonetheless I find it's getting harder and harder by the day to be here only because I know how hard it's going to be to leave. My life is here. My friends are here. When May comes around though, everything is going to change. I'll be thrust cruelly into what adults call "life." I learn through my own mistakes as much as others. I'll learn to be self-dependent or die.

I know that more learning is what's next for me. I know that I'll eventually pursue a master's degree of sort some sort., but until that time God only knows what I'm going to be doing. With all of the stress and looming sadness however, God has given me a word. I need to just concentrate on my life one day at a time, and He's going to fill in the blanks. I don't know exactly what God has for me, but I do know that I'm merely a child in comparison to him and I need to trust him as if I were still a child in human comparison.

Come May, I know I'll be ready to go. There will be tears and it will be sad, but I know that for my friends and mentors it'll be bitter sweet. Because whereas we know that we are parting and that we may never reunite in this life, we have the hope that we'll be together on the other side in that cafeteria table in the sky.

God is good.

-scritch out

This is waaaaaaaay too many bits

Do we posses the ability to truly be expressive while hiding beneath the weighty thumb of censorship? The optimist inside of me that often tears at the walls of my mind and screams loudly wants to answer "Yes." The pessimist who lurks cleverly in the corner of my mouth, however, inevitably answers, "No." It's actually quite difficult to act within confines. We are told by our leaders to be expressive and to embrace our God given gifts, but when things begin to creep outside of their realm of control, we're stifled in our attempts. Is this a bad thing? Meh. Sometimes I think that control is needed. I mean, without some law and guidance we'd more or less float off into a space of anarchist hulabaloo. That's right, I said it. . . hulabaloo. Right?

But lack of control is just as bad as too much. When people are given unlimited power, anarchy ensues. There is no control and everyone either falls into chaos or all follow after one person which places that person in the role of controller. So control is inevitable, but the confines which a person applies to another are manageable.

In the right hands, creative control can be a good thing . . . a guiding force . . . a jedi master . . .

But in the wrong, it becomes too restricting and causes the discomfort and eventual rebellion of others.

So all of this to say, "Beware those of you who have power . . for someday, you will have to answer for how you treated those who were beneath you . . . whether it be to God . . . or 20 angry people with metaphorical pitch forks, torches, and strongly worded letters."

This being said . . . Macbeth auditions next week . . . Look for my sign . . . or e-mail.

-Scritch out